There Is No Finish Line
(My misunderstanding the process...)
Lately I have been getting a message. The message is that my eagerness in reaching any goal that I have built up in my mind as being the ultra important, isn't really the point. The point is that I have been missing is the process, the path, the ride, that I have to take is more important.
I have had this aspect of myself that tells me to, "go, go, go, push to the end, get to the end." I have been agreeing to this idea that, "this is how it is done." This is how I have been living my life for so long that it became a mantra that I would chant (without realizing it) when taking on any kind of task, any kind of learning process. I kept telling myself that by getting to the end of the chapter was the goal, finishing the course was all that was needed. The finish line is what matters, or so I thought.
Being in this state takes away from my experience of the journey, and the lessons that I need to learn. When I am so focused on the end of it, I miss the lessons. I think they sink in, but they don't and this causes these things to keep coming back, and this in turns causes me return to the previous states that I once thought I have moved through. Then I repeat the process, charging toward the finish line. Waiting to receive my trophy for such a job well done, while not learning, growing, or evolving in any way what so ever.
So why do I do this? Why have I adopted this approach to many aspects of my life? Well, I agreed to it. It was handed down to me at an early age, and I just assumed this was "how things work." Finish, and win then things are gonna be good. This in turn lead me to live in the future. To think forward and not be present in the moment when the lessons that need to be learned can be attended to. I also realize it kept me living in the past as well. To look back and wonder what went wrong, the who, what, and why of the situation, and tell myself the next time will be different. It never was. It happens all the same, over and over again.
Now I realize my mistake. I now see how the frenzy of reaching the end clouded what I needed to see. It kept me from growing and becoming who I truly am. It really isn't the end goal that matters, if there really is such a thing. It is the process, and the path that are more important in me attaining the level of spiritual growth that I am drawn to. It is the journey that will teach me the lessons I need, and show me the way to the connection with all things that I and everyone else deserves.
Live in the moment is my mantra now. Pay attention to the things that are presented to me, and look at them. Learn from them and grow. This is the way for me, and I realize now there really is no finish line.
Being in this state takes away from my experience of the journey, and the lessons that I need to learn. When I am so focused on the end of it, I miss the lessons. I think they sink in, but they don't and this causes these things to keep coming back, and this in turns causes me return to the previous states that I once thought I have moved through. Then I repeat the process, charging toward the finish line. Waiting to receive my trophy for such a job well done, while not learning, growing, or evolving in any way what so ever.
So why do I do this? Why have I adopted this approach to many aspects of my life? Well, I agreed to it. It was handed down to me at an early age, and I just assumed this was "how things work." Finish, and win then things are gonna be good. This in turn lead me to live in the future. To think forward and not be present in the moment when the lessons that need to be learned can be attended to. I also realize it kept me living in the past as well. To look back and wonder what went wrong, the who, what, and why of the situation, and tell myself the next time will be different. It never was. It happens all the same, over and over again.
Now I realize my mistake. I now see how the frenzy of reaching the end clouded what I needed to see. It kept me from growing and becoming who I truly am. It really isn't the end goal that matters, if there really is such a thing. It is the process, and the path that are more important in me attaining the level of spiritual growth that I am drawn to. It is the journey that will teach me the lessons I need, and show me the way to the connection with all things that I and everyone else deserves.
Live in the moment is my mantra now. Pay attention to the things that are presented to me, and look at them. Learn from them and grow. This is the way for me, and I realize now there really is no finish line.
By Lang
